This seemingly harmless boy has caused an uproar in my family. This is because he is the first boy I have ever brought home and called a boyfriend. In fact, he is the first boy I have even admitted to my family that I dated or liked (perhaps excepting a boyfriend in first grade or in sixth grade). Everybody is used to my being single without even a date. I suppose that I lowered their expectations, and then suddenly, BAM! Without warning, found a boy who swept me off my feet and caused chaos. We've been dating for almost a year now, which is longer than I've ever dated anybody.
I knew that bringing him home would be a success. This was for one main reason: he is an accounting major. Everybody (except me) who has been in college in my family has majored in either finance or accounting. This is mostly because they are all smarter than me and they think of actually getting a job when they graduate. Therefore, anybody who is practical enough to be an accounting major is an instant winner as far as anybody in my family is concerned.
The first time I brought him home, my dad explained how to avoid cramps (drink pickle juice), my mom explained how to get into medical school, and my brother and I cowered in the corner, hoping that he would not think we were too weird.
Now they have progressed to liking him for more than his simply being an accounting major, and he has been incorporated into our daily lives. I told my mom that his mom says, "thrifty is nifty" and my mom went around saying, "nifty is thrifty" for days after. Whenever we see a cute baby, we coo "Emmmmmmaaa," because that is his little niece's name. He is also making my town crazy. Some people freak him out by saying that they will do research on his family and figure out if he is a nice boy. My aunt and uncle asked me if I kiss him. My brother's friends are obsessed with him. Somebody who was not in my family even gave him a Christmas present. Even though he may want to run (and maybe should), I think this all just goes to show that he has captured their hearts as well as mine.
Friday, December 30, 2005
Last night my family fried oysters for dinner. This is crazy because my family never fries food (I'm so not used to it that if I eat french fries and a hamburger at school, my stomach hurts for the rest of the night). My mother is a very healthy eater--her friends once told her that she was a health food nut before it was in vogue--and this even reaches to the point where we make lentils as a treat (we did so this week). My dad, on the other hand, loves food that is not healthy (like cheese). He makes homemade pizza and piles five inches of cheese on the top. I don't think the poor man knew who he was marrying--now he only gets cheese as a treat. He once asked my mom if he could get nacho cheese for some tacos and she said, "sure, we can get nacho cheese (at this point his face lit up)--when you lose twenty pounds!!" He quit asking for the cheese.
So anyway, yesterday my parents came home from a trip out of town (note to self: never let them out of town--they always come back with crazy and wild ideas) and they decided to fry oysters for dinner.
This operation began with their finding that they left a bag of groceries at Wal-Mart. Then my dad began to wash they oysters and started to say, "Grody. Gro-T. Abbie, this is Grooo--teeee." Apparently they were slimy. Next he got out Crisco (my arteries clog just by thinking of that junk) and got everything ready to fry. He was doing a good job of coating the oysters with crackers and flour when suddenly he yelled, "Connie!!!" My mom came running in the kitchen and had to be on coating duty. This process became a three-person ordeal when my dad discovered that my mom was coating the oysters incorrectly and thought I would do a better job. During this time, I had been doing a crossword at the kitchen table, hoping that I would not get involved, but they forced me to coat the oysters. Apparently I coated them too much, so I was quickly taken off duty.
After all this work, the oysters were delicious. My parents did a really good job in the end. The moral of the story is that cooking good food takes a lot of work and one should just go to a restaurant.
Thursday, December 29, 2005
This was the scene outside my bedroom door when I woke up this morning. I think my mom is trying to tell me something, but I am having trouble interpreting the message. This could have been how the cave people communicated before a language was invented. Even though I appreciate my mom's attempt at a history lesson, I think I'll ignore it for the time being.
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Please excuse me while I show off the grand masters of braking, twirling, and jumping on the ice. Today my family, David, and I skated outside and it was a ton of fun.
This picture is perfect because it embodies two major forms of entertainment during the skating. First of all, the zamboni. A zamboni is of a higher caliber than a bulldozer or other pieces of major equipment. I could watch one operate for hours. Zambonis have always been way cool. The zambonis are by far the best part of the old Nintendo hockey game (except for the huge hockey players who could check the little skinny twerps), and one is featured in the Charlie Brown comic strip. Why are they so cool? They really look like any other vehicle. Really, anyone who loves zambonis is kind of loserish, but today we got to watch one dump the ice out of its container and it was rockin' (I think I am even more of a loser because I used "rockin'"--even with the apostrophe--in a blog).
The other form of entertainment was this kid. This obnoxious kid kept trying to get attention by stepping over the chain that blocked off the ice while the zamboni was in operation. This activity was quelled when, finally, he fell on his butt.
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Monday, December 26, 2005
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Every year, my parents give me and my brother a tool so that by the time we are grown we each have a complete tool set. Before Christmas, we try to guess the tool, and so we eagerly await opening our Christmas presents to see who is correct. This is especially exciting since we have graduated from the basic tools to more creative tools (last year we got a chisel).
This time my parents pulled a fast one on us. I was expecting a level because mine had mysteriously jumped out of my tool box and traveled to Jamaica. However, we pulled a C-Clamp out of our stockings. My mom explained that the C-Clamp is rated one of the most essential tools by Rolling Stone and that we can use it to hold stuff together while gluing.
These tools are beginning to grow on me since the most recent ones have been art-related. I suppose now I can sculpt something and glue it back together if I mess up. Or maybe I am supposed to pry things apart with the chisel and use the C-Clamp to clamp something else (???). The funny thing about these tools is that I never have a chance to really use them. If I am actually aware that I am in a situation that requires tools, I usually have somebody there who will jerk them out of my hands and teach me "the correct way to use them". I think the last time I used a tool while unsupervised I attempted to hammer a lock off my computer.
Just so you don't think that my parents are horrible gift-givers or grinches, I will let you know that my brother and I also received our other annual gift: salad dressing. Yes, we seriously open these gifts every year and the sad part is that we like them.
Thursday, December 22, 2005
David visited my house yesterday and today. It was a lot of fun, but it is always weird to have my school friends visit my small hometown. It seems like I am giving a penguin a tour of my home in the jungle. That was a horrible analogy, but anyway, it seems like my guests always think my town is weird.
Tomorrow we are having family come to our house. I am looking forward to Christmas!
Perhaps these reindeer ears will make their way to another blog in a few days... Have a Happy Holiday!
On Tuesday, I met my longtime friend Rach for lunch. We had a discussion about the workers at the restaurant in the mall. One of the workers said, "Merry Christmas" to the customers when she took their orders. I know there is a lot of discussion regarding the politically correct way to wish somebody a happy holiday. Usually, I just say, "Happy Holidays!" because that includes whatever religious holiday one may observe and also the new year. Rach and I decided that if somebody said Happy Hanaukah to us, we would not be offended, but is probably because we celebrate the religious holiday of the majority. Then we decided to create a word: Kwhanamas. This is cool because it is fun to say and also includes some of the major religious holidays. You should give it a try. It is like a fun smooshed sandwich of three nice holidays.
I just realized that this post really has no point, except that I got to type Kwhanamas, which is just plain fun.
Sunday, December 18, 2005
[16:09] abbie0317: it wasn't supposed to do that!
[16:10] abbie0317: grr
[16:11] ccmachine85: that is odd
[16:12] abbie0317: gah!
[16:12] abbie0317: somehow it got saved as a draft
[16:12] abbie0317: it would be funny if it were a draft beer!
[16:12] abbie0317: hahahahaa
[16:13] ccmachine85: haha
[16:13] ccmachine85: oh my god
[16:14] abbie0317: what
[16:14] ccmachine85: please post that, so people can see up with what i put
Chex mix is a big deal at my house because it is everybody's favorite treat. We used to fight about the portions so much that now, when my dad makes it, we divide the mix equally among ourselves and store it in our own Ziplock bags.
This hoarding has gone a little far. Yesterday I actually said, "Dad, we better make the Chex Mix before David gets here, or else we're gonna have to share it with him." I think I need to go to confession.
Friday, December 16, 2005
We have hit an all-time low.
Tonight, David said, "Hey Abbie, do you want to see who can gargle the longest?"
The competition was intense. Just as I was wondering exactly when this contest would end (because one can take breaths while gargling, and therefore the contest would continue until the water evaporated or something), I realized that we were indeed having a gargling contest.
Thursday, December 15, 2005
Whenever I move out of my room, I always find items that are seriously baffling. Why did I pack these things in the first place? Why did I allow them to use space in this very small dorm room? And even better, why am I packing them to go home?
This shoe cannot be worn unless the sun is shining and there is no water on the paths outside. A teardrop could seep through its sole.
These are Christmas lights and shamrock decorations. They have been sitting in this very pile all semester.
Instead of walking to the library to return these books and CD, I just keep renewing them online. I don't feel bad because I doubt that anybody was waiting on the edge of their seat for Plato's Timaeus as a Cultural Icon.
This is an interesting item. I have not seen it unrolled for about a year.
Ah! I remember now. I painted this in high school.
I started using these Whitestrips two summers ago and still have exactly two left. I better save the 50x50 foot box just in case I forget that I have them.
The next item was one of my parents' wedding presents. This is possibly the best of all:
Why?! I guess thought I would make smoothies with the one piece of fruit they let us take out of the cafeteria.
My roommate Julie moved out today. My room is very empty, just like my heart. I never realized how much I enjoyed just having her stuff in this room until she moved out. This is her side:
This is the bag of chips that I will eat tonight to quell my depression:
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
"I'm not really reading my notes. I'm actually going through my songs on this computer. However, they are sitting on my leg, so maybe the information will travel to my brain."
"I just read the Cliffs Notes for the wrong book. Candide seems pretty interesting."
Today my Student Advisor knocked on my dorm door and told my roommate that I needed to sign up for a check-out time. Checking out is such a pain, mostly because I never pack until the very last minute. Last semester I had an assembly line of people putting things in boxes, and then David helped me carry my things to my car for over two hours.
I'm not getting a very big head start this semester.
Jules just checked out the vacuum cleaner. This thing was a monster.
A warning button kept lighting, so we had to keep turning the thing on and off to get it to work. When we turned it off for good, it made a noise like a sick spaceship and finally died.